Ranking QAnon and MAGA Conferences: The Q Con in the Abandoned Outlet Mall Without Air Conditioning

"COVID likes this"

Second to Last Place
Organizer: Scott Kesterson
Event: BardsFest
Cost of Admission: $5
Location: St. Louis, MO
Date: August 2021

BardsFest was supposed to be one of the more elaborate QAnon conferences. While most Q Cons only sold general or VIP seating without assigned seats, tickets for BardsFest were sold individually, with seats close to the stage running over $100 per seat, per day. Grifters know their audience, though, so there was also a cheaper option: a parking lot drive-in with a jumbo screen, complete with carnival rides for kids.

Unfortunately for the organizers, they chose to sell their tickets on TicketMaster. Alex Kaplan at Media Matters wrote about this, and both Ticketmaster and the venue backed out of the event. Instead, we ended up in the parking lot of an abandoned outlet mall (in case you aren’t aware, Missouri is extremely hot during the summer). On the plus side, ticket prices dropped down to $5! This was truly a bargain, since the speaker line up included draws such as Mike “Mr. Pillow” Lindell and weirdo gun-and-mustard guy Mark McCloskey.

The Vibe

The vibes were completely fucked, to be honest!! I showed up halfway through the second day, because by August 2021 I was tired of doing weird QAnon shit (and I had just gone to Portland to watch a race riot with a Nazi), and a four day Q festival in the Missouri heat would have ended me.

This pathetic, silent scene is what I saw when I showed up:

At first I thought the event just had low turn out, but everyone was actually inside the abandoned outlet mall! Inside, without air flow, crammed into an old food court. People sat on the counters of the closed down eateries, charging their phones in the abandoned kitchens. Circuit City signage surrounded the stage. A lone pretzel shop was the only option for food inside the mall, and an ice rink that was somehow still functioning offered the only cold air in the building. Neat!!!!!

I have been to hell.

Music

The organizers promised live music each night, which was really more of a threat than a treat. By the end of my first day, I was so miserable I couldn’t take it. I called an Uber, and just as he got to the parking lot, I heard someone doing the worst possible cover of Dolly Parton’s Jolene. I abandoned my Uber and sprinted closer to the stage to capture this video:

As a reminder, Dolly Parton famously helped fund the Moderna vaccine, but hey, who cares about facts when you’re having fun????

The next night, QAnon musician JT Wilde dedicated a song to journalist Will Sommer’s Uber driver’s car mechanic. It was extremely weird!!!

Afterwards, Joseph Flynn, brother of QAnon adherent and disgraced general Michael Flynn, jumped up on stage to, uh, perform Come Together with JT Wilde. Forgive the video — I was running around trying to shoot from all angles so I could immediately post a clip to Twitter without outing my location.

Afterwards, I stood in line to buy an autographed CD from JT Wilde (obviously).

Than Q. Get it??????

The Swag

This conference had basically no swag, though for a $5 donation I got a bunch of John Birch Society crap, so that was pretty cool!! Always remember: "the consequences to public schools are real." 

Jeff thinks I’m “an enemy of our country” now, but he thought I was great back in the day!

QAnon influencer Jeffrey Pedersen (aka InTheMatrixxx) was at the JT Wilde and Joe Flynn extravaganza, and he gave me a hug and a bracelet (and we took a selfie!) — though that isn’t really conference swag.

Per his later posts, this influencer was NOT actually all better!!

I guess the only thing people really got for free at the conference was COVID-19. That’s right — cramming a bunch of unvaccinated COVID deniers into an abandoned mall without ventilation somehow resulted in everyone getting sick. I had just recovered from a COVID infection I picked up at a Project Veritas party across from a Turning Point USA event, so I was fine, but good lord was everyone else crying about how sick they were on Facebook for weeks after. They’re all still COVID deniers, though!

This influencer would later blame COVID infections at events she attended on anthrax poisoning!!!

Bottom Line

It fucking sucked!! It was so hot!!!!! There was no air conditioning!! Each day was like 12 hours, and we only had pretzels to eat!! I was so hungry!! I left a day early to go to an antivax protest in Santa Monica, but I would have had to leave early no matter what. Way across the parking lot there was a Cabela’s, and I kept going in and buying snacks just to feel cool air again. Also, someone put Chick Tracts in the bathroom — no thank you!! The highlight of my entire trip was NOT getting COVID!

Personal

I had never been to STL before, and I didn’t even get to see the stupid arch. I continue to be bitter about this.

Previous: Starting with Last Place: Women for America First

A bit of housekeeping - I’ll be running a sale on Substack for $42.50 annual subscriptions that will last as long as it takes for me to finish the rankings.

Follow me here, Twitter, TikTok, or Instagram. All of my Substack posts are unlocked, but subscriptions or tips always appreciated!